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Buffalo's VIP fixation reaches the underworld

Catacombs

Surely Buffalo leads the world in VIP designations. We love our VIP statuses here in Buffalo! The World's Largest Disco has VIP tickets. Bars and clubs have VIP seats. And now comes the ultimate:

We even have VIP status in haunted houses!

Today's Groupon deal offers VIP tickets to Cheektowaga's House of Horrors and Haunted Catacombs (shown above, along with owner Tim Bunch, in a fearsome News file photo).

For $30 you get a VIP haunted house tour for two -- a $60 value, Groupon tells us. These deals are always fun to read, and Groupon describes the Cheektowaga haunt thus: "Foggy hidden passageways cradled in darkness give way to a menagerie of monsters, from zombie soldiers wielding sledgehammers to demonic surgeons hungry for the under insured."

As the devil says in John Milton's "Paradise Lost": "It is better to reign in hell than to serve in heaven."

In Buffalo-speak that is "It is better to be a VIP in hell than to be a nothing in heaven."

See you in the catacombs.

The VIP section!

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