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On the third day of Christmas, Spotify gave to me ...

Radio2... We do not want to say what!

Remember the other day, when Spotify responded to all our playing of Christmas carols sung by the Vienna Choir Boys, the Choir of King's College Cambridge, etc. by recommending Bone Thugs-N-Harmony?

It has gotten worse!

Now Spotify is into breaking up our classical Christmas playlist by advertising, ahem ...

... We hate saying this! ...

... Trojan condoms.

What in the world, you know? It happened to a friend of ours, too. He wrote: "I'm listening to 'Christmas with Peggy Lee' right now on Spotify, and it keeps playing the same Trojan condom ad every few songs, complete with the 'Trojan Man' jingle."

That must have been the Trojan Man jingle we were hearing. It was really adult, is all we can say. Really adult.

These are not tidings of great joy!

The not-sweet smell of success

Macken

Driving down the 190, a truck passed us -- a red truck belonging to Macken Services, a Lancaster company specializing in sump pumps, grease traps, septic tanks, leach fields, we do not know what else and we do not want to know.

The back of the truck cracked us up.

It read:

"Our Business Stinks."

Why couldn't Buffalo branch out like this?

Brevard, N.C., has a museum devoted to old aluminum Christmas trees.

We need a museum of something vintage and funny. Our Pierce Arrows are just too classy.

How about a museum of our vintage spices and cleansers?

Doomsday forecast takes chilling twist

Sweet Jenny's in Williamsville gives us the scoop.

Jennymayans

Har de har-har! Call William Mattar

Santa

The lawyer William Mattar, he's so bizarre!

His sense of humor, anyway. Buzz loves it. Once, we saw on Twitter that someone had seen a toddler walking along singing, "Hurt by a car? Call William Mattar!" Ha, ha! Even funnier, the Tweet was re-tweeted by William Mattar.

Now, we hear that in honor of the holidays, Mattar has a new jingle.

It's "Hurt by a sleigh? Call us today!"

The news of this comes from Cheryl Raffel of Wheatfield. "As much as I get tired of the commercials, that made me laugh," she says. "So now we have to watch out for speeding sleighs!"

We must indeed.

We hear Santa has deep pockets!

Lowdown @ the Lafayette

The raucous poster for the wild New Year's Eve party @ the Hotel @ the Lafayette.

The spirit of the old Lafayette Hotel lives on!

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Pop goes the Christmas tree

Waaaah, everyone we know is on his or her second or third Christmas tree and we have not even picked ours out yet!

And here it is what, 60 degrees? How are we to get into that Christmas tree spirit now?

The window of opportunity is shut!

But the door to Tops is open. Seriously, we love displays, and this one's a doozy. 

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Frank Lloyd Wright thought he was something with his Tree of Life.

It has nothing on the Tree of Schweppes!

Give the gift of time -- on the ceiling

If you clip the coupons from The Buffalo News' Sunday paper one of the surprise dividends you get is, you get to see ads for some mighty unusual things.

Such as this!

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Here is a closeup on our favorite part of the ad. Imagine, you are awake in the middle of the night and there this thing is, splashing the time up all over the ceiling.

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Buzz also likes how at the top of the ad it says: "Receive a Free Surprise Gift With Every Order."

If we do not all immediately get on the phone and order this clock for everyone on our gift lists, we have all seriously lost our mojo.

This little capitalist went to market

Two reasons to love the free market: Tops and Wegmans.

The Wegmans ad makes you want to say "Aaaahhhh." It is so relaxing!

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Whereas the Tops ad is screaming at you like a carnival barker.

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But even being opposites they compete.  And they go right on ahead and name names! A closeup of the cover of the Wegmans ad:

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The bargain turkey price this year is 49 cents a pound. That is at least 10 cents over last year's, a 25 percent increase. We are just saying. 

But why look a gift turkey in the mouth? We will gobble it up.

And give thanks, as always, for our rival supermarkets!

Attention Shur-Fine shoppers

Pictures 2012-10-15 064

Buzz loves the Shur-Fine brand. It is so retro! And in Sunday's Budwey's ad -- it's one of the first things we look for in the Sunday paper -- we got a Shur-Fine surprise.

A huge long list of Shur-Fine items you could order by the case! That was what it looked like, anyway.

We never remembered seeing this before. We wondered if it was a screw-up, if it had been slipped mistakenly somehow into the slinger.

But no! We called the Newfane Budwey's and this is for real.

You fill out the big old Shur-Fine order form and bring it to customer service.

"And you can just put down a little down payment," said the personable woman we spoke with.

Just like 1965!

Shur-Fine Sauerkraut! Shur-Fine Magic Mallow Cereal! Shur-Fine Laundry Detergent Classic With Bleach! Shur-Fine Mushroom Pieces and Stems! (Shur-Fine belongs to the era before people began to sneer at canned mushrooms.)

We can all have a Shur-Fine week!

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