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Buffalo's Funniest Priest

StinkSunday morning, foolishly trying to drive to church in the snow, Buzz got stuck not once but twice and had to be dug out both times by Good Samaritans. But that is another story for another day.

Today's story involves where we ended up, which is at St. Mark's, a church we prudently slogged to on foot. The church was full and we soon saw one reason why:

Their priest, Father Joseph Rogliano, is like Denis Leary without the obscenities!

His homily, about how we all shouldn't be so busy this time of year, riffed on his Christmas shopping struggles. One nephew loves a video game called "Sky... Skylander?" the priest said. "They have names I'm gonna share. The one he wants is Stink Bomb. Of course that's the one you can't find anywhere," he declaimed, as the audience -- er, congregation -- roared.

A niece had similar wants. "I'm tired of looking for Cheerleader Barbie, I will tell you that. I finally found her on eBay. Is $200 a lot to pay?"

Is getting stuck in the snow a lot to pay for enjoying these laughs? We think not!

Sunday, we were blessed!

 

The Holiday Gig From Hell

A certain Buffalo singer has a gig coming up for a local business group at a local country club. The organizers request two hours of seasonal music -- but no mention of Christmas ...

NoChristmasTree1

... or Santa Claus ...

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... or even holidays.

What to do??

Well, there's "Winter Wonderland."

"That's right," our singer friend said. "And ....?"

Yikes, even most 96.1 Joy FM standards don't qualify. "Frosty the Snowman" might be OK. And "Jingle Bells." And "Let it Snow."

Beyond that you are on thin ice. Even "Winter Wonderland" has that problematic mention of Parson Brown. Well, maybe people have forgotten that a parson is a pastor.

You could sing "O Christmas Tree" in German because "Tannenbaum" is technically fir tree, not Christmas tree. But try explaining that to your employers as they are showing you the wreathless door.

No-holly

Two hours of this! Good luck with that, we told our singer friend.

Better you than Buzz!

 

The Ultimate Church Barbecue

Meth church

Buzz's buddy Ryan Lysarz saw this sign today. If you hurry you can still get to this picnic.

What kind of a church is this, anyway?

Whatever, it sounds like quite the event!

Church Preaches To the Choir

Buzz joined the choir and this sign went up.

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Military Group Joins Battle To Save St. Ann's Church

A meeting tonight at 7 at St. Columba-Brigid Church to strategize on saving beautiful St. Ann's Church, which has been condemned by the Buffalo diocese, is shaping up to have a touch of military might.

Continue reading "Military Group Joins Battle To Save St. Ann's Church" »

Hell And Damnation in Downtown Buffalo

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It has been a long time since Buzz heard a good old-fashioned street preacher. And a terrific one was holding forth just now on Main and Division streets downtown.

His voice blasted operatically down the block even though he had no megaphone. He had a good captive audience in the dozens of people waiting for buses.

The best thing is, he actually shouted "Repent!" as preachers are supposed to.

"Repent! Repent! Prepare for the King of Jerusalem!" he thundered.

"Hell is not some place where you shake hands with the devil and say, 'Hey, it's nice to meet you!' " he roared. "The worm dieth not! And the fire is never extinguished!"

At one point he declaimed: "You think I want to be here? I don't want to be here! I would rather be home playing my Xbox!"

Buzz apologizes that the picture is not more distinct but the preacher was shy and did not want to give his name. We asked him after he left off preaching. However he did tell say he was from the Seneca Babcock area. And we learned he comes from Charity Baptist Church in Black Rock.

Thank you, Charity Baptist, for letting us borrow this preacher for a day! And a most modest preacher at that.

"I didn't want to be here today," he reiterated to Buzz. "I would rather be home with my Xbox."

How bad a Monday can it be...

...  when you open The Buffalo News and see a headline reading:

"Rogue Priests Preside At Subterranean Services"

It is on page B2 of the print edition today (Monday). 

The story is about the parishioners at St. Ann's Church ...

St. ann's

... trying to keep the place from closing. "Ousted Parishioners Cling On In Basement," runs the main headline.

This story is heartbreaking.

But the headlines are great!

Church's Divisions Are Tough On Priest

St. anthony 183

The new museum at St. Anthony of Padua Church includes a fascinating model of the church that plays up the parish's amusingly schizophrenic nature.

The Italian and English language Mass-goers place the priest facing the people, behind the low altar.

The folks who go to the Tridentine Mass in Latin, when they pass by, turn him around so that he faces the same direction as the people, behind the high altar.

It is an ongoing battle. Father faces this way. He faces that way. He does the Hokey Pokey and he turns himself around. The above picture Buzz snapped, if you want to blow it up and look at it closely, shows the priest in Latin Mass mode.

The guide smiled and sighed: "The Latin Mass people have gotten at this again."

10 things Buzz likes about Pope Francis

Pope

Buzz is enslaved today, shackled to our desk, too busy to deal with dogma or theology, but real quick, here goes: Ten things that appeal to us about Pope Francis, pictured above...

1. Can dance the tango. Could John Paul II do that? Huh? Could he?

2. Takes the bus as Buzz is wont to do. (Make that took the bus. In Rome he will probably have to kick that habit.)

3. Likes to cook!

Continue reading "10 things Buzz likes about Pope Francis" »

Have a six pack handy...

Zywiec-six

Don't ask us how or why, but Buzz wound up on the St. Stanislaus Church Web site, reading this recipe for bigos. Bigos is a Polish hunter's stew you make in a crock pot.

You need a six-pack of Zywiec and reading the recipe you see why.

Hahahaaa!

Actually the recipe looks pretty good. One of these days we will make bigos.

And follow the instructions, exactly!

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