Reader David Breth sent me an e-mail today regarding my column on the horrors of shoveling the driveway. He not only agreed with the whole premise, he went me one better and included this table, debating which is worse, raking leaves or getting rid of snow?
--- Bruce Andriatch
|
Description |
Raking Leaves |
Snow removal |
|
Pain |
Blisters, exhaustion, and sore muscles. |
It's cold. Penetrates the gloves through the metal handles of the snowblower. Back-wrenching work hauling the old snowblower back and forth through ruts, fighting it at the end of the driveway, mental anxiety of stalls, etc. Shoveling, when necessary, is a back-killer after a while |
|
Frequency |
Seems like it should be one-time chore, but it really happens two or three times. |
Random. Happens whenever snow is deep or depth exceeds my wife’s tolerance level. |
|
Nagging |
My wife does not nag me to rake leaves |
My wife nags me to clear the driveway |
|
Town Truck |
Makes leaves go away |
Shoves snow in my driveway |
|
Impact from neighbors |
Their leaves blow on my property, and I have to rake them. |
None. |
|
Weather |
Weather dependent – rain, severe wind prevent it. A truly miserable experience in cold weather. Allergies a consideration. |
Weather dependent – if favorable, no chore. If unfavorable, chore exists. If unfavorable and persistent, chore is worsened. Wind is always contrary, ready to blow snow in my face and behind my glasses. |
|
Urgency |
Has to be done by a date certain, which is uncertain - prior to first snow, and prior to the last appearance of the leaf-removal truck. |
Should be done prior to wifely requests in order to secure domestic harmony, and to enable use of driveway if snow is deep. I have to shovel out an area for the dog in the back yard, or it creates a problem. As season wears on, involves inadvertent shoveling of frozen canine pooplettes. |
|
Family Fun |
Dog and kids like to play in the leaves. Once in a while wife will help rake. We take pictures. |
What family? Are there other people in the house? Any photos taken are from the warmth of the house, of a lonesome figure badly obscured by a blinding snowstorm or in a blinding rage with snow behind his glasses. |
|
Variability |
Wet leaves are more of a pain to deal with than dry leaves. Dry dog poop is easier to accidentally rake than wet dog poop. |
Wet, heavy snow = Snowblower can’t do it = I do it with shovel = Snow gets stuck in blade of shovel = Wife’s ill-timed suggestion that I borrow neighbor’s snowblower or I’m going to have a heart attack = Inappropriate response from me. Conversely, light, puffy snow = Windy snow in my face. |
|
Consequences of failure to do the job |
Grass dies, thus preventing me from cutting lawn in the spring. Oh dear. |
Domestic reminders that it needs to be done. Mailman won’t deliver mail. Cars can’t get in or out of driveway. Visitors get soaked walking up to the house and track snow in the house which would then be my fault. Risk of me offering wife driving advice for getting in driveway at a time when she is not receptive to it. |
