The empty minivan

Byron Jenkins is a soccer dad from Saskatoon, Saskatchewan, who is suffering from what could be called Empty Minivan Syndrome. The youngest of his three children graduated from high school last June. Now, Jenkins doesn't know what to do with all his free time.

Jenkins, in an essay in Toronto's Globe and Mail, says that for eight years, he was "out there on canoe trips, for football games, badminton tournaments, variety nights, school dances, band camp, jazz concerts, swimming training, school tours, parent-teacher meetings, Remembrance Day services and Christmas concerts."

Now that it's all over, he is going through severe withdrawal.

"I should be happy with all the free time I have," he writes. "I could travel, write a book, get a real social life. But I was hooked."

Read or listen to the whole essay here.

Jenkins' piece is light in tone and it no doubt touches a chord in all of us. I know that the empty nest years will hit me with the force of an NFL linebacker. But there is also a cautionary tale here. Did Mr. Jenkins lose himself a little too much in his fatherly duties? Is spending every weekend driving our children to swim meets, music camps, etc., etc., really for their benefit, or for ours?

Jenkins writes that "Being a high-school parent was an escape valve for me. Watching a raucous basketball game or a lively musical was a welcome diversion after a 9-to-5 day in my middle-aged work world."

It's great, for the most part, that today's parents make the time to support their kids' activities so much. But we'd be well-advised not to completely define ourselves by that role.

---Greg

Comments

[Buffalo Libertarian]

Greg asked: "Is spending every weekend driving our children to swim meets, music camps, etc., etc., really for their benefit, or for ours?"

Well, there is that whole thing of parents trying to live vicariously through their children. Then, of course, there are the helicopter parents ruining the lives of Millennials everywhere.

Jenkins wrote: "Watching a raucous basketball game or a lively musical was a welcome diversion after a 9-to-5 day in my middle-aged work world."

That's what weekends are for.

Greg wrote: "But we'd be well-advised not to completely define ourselves by that role."

Yeah, pretty much. This is one of those areas where that hackneyed phrase "Get a life!" is appropriate.