Nathan Hite, Idol's 'ninth-grade repeater'

OK, this is funny. Nathan Hite, the 16-year-old "ninth-grade repeater" who tried and failed to snap back at Simon during the Atlanta auditions, has a MySpace page with very little on it -- except his name, Lestat De Lioncourt (the vampire from the Anne Rice novels -- how original for a magenta-highlighted goth kid) and this quote: "My words will brush your cheek like a feather ... or cut through you like a burning knife."

During an audition show, when so many of the people on stage delusionally believe that they can sing, it's funny to see somebody who's deluded that he's witty. And intelligent. And a master of the quick comeback.

When Nathan exits the room, unbowed by Simon's slapdown, two older folks who are probably his parents stand by looking mortified as Ryan has a few parting words with Nathan. "I told you -- lippy," says the woman apologetically. "Well, lippy's fine," Ryan says. For TV,  maybe. But can you imagine having to live with this insufferable kid??

-- Anne Neville