If you removed the ads for CBS, the NFL, and various movies, the New Orleans Saints-Indianapolis Colts matchup would have been even shorter. There were some clunkers -- GoDaddy has officially crossed the threshold from sort of offensive but mildly funny to idiotic -- there were still plenty of humorous ads. Here are my selections for best and worst. Please contribute the ones you liked and didn't!
-- "Snickers: Betty White" Everyone's favorite saucy senior, wearing a pastel track suit and with her hair immaculately coiffed, plays in a rough pickup football game. After she's tackled into a puddle, a teammate says, "Mike, you've been playing like Betty White all day!" and she snaps back, "That's not what your girlfriend says!" But Mike's girlfriend hands him a Snickers bar and he morphs back into himself. But wait -- another guy has changed into Abe Vigoda, who growls, "That hurt," when he's tackled to the ground. "You're not yourself when you're hungry," is the tagline. "Snickers satisfies." I am sure no old folks were harmed in the making of this funny commercial!
-- "Bud Light: Light House" A man invites his friends to see his "new abode" -- a house house made of Bud Light cans -- full ones. The knowledge that they contain Bud Light sparks a frenzy among his pals. One marvels, "There's Bud Light in a fridge made of Bud Light!" But then they remove a few too many cans ...
-- "Google: Parisian Love" A Google search engine page is used to search terms, starting with "study abroad Paris France" to "what are truffles" and "who is Truffaut" as a simple piano melody plays. Long-distance relationships, churches in Paris .. you can see where this is leading. It's simple, charming and very real, down to the misspellings.
-- Letterman, Leno and Oprah: It was an ad for Letterman's show, so after he groused, "Worst Super Bowl Party ever!" and the camera panned back to show Oprah sitting very close to him on the couch, it was surprising enough. But then, next to her, Leno complained, "You're only saying that because I'm here!" which Letterman mocked. Good sports, all three.
-- "E-Trade: Girlfriend" The ETrade baby, slightly older, tells his extremely cute infant girlfriend that he didn't call because he was busy diversifying his portfolio on ETrade "like a wolf!" "And that milkaholic Lindsay wasn't over?" she asks. "MilkaWHAT?" pipes up Lindsay from the side of the screen.
-- GoDaddy: Just GO! Danica Patrick is approached by various women who want to be the Go Daddy girl. In one, her masseuse rips off her shirt, showing a tank top, to demonstrate her assets. Way to set back the reputation of therapeutic massage!
-- The Tim and Pam Tebow ad: It was sweet when Tim's mom talked about how much she cared about him and all the times she almost lost him .. not so sweet when he tackled her. Following the Betty White tackle, it seemed like piling on.
-- Men without pants: While the CareerBuilder ad where a raft of extremely unattractive coworkers wore only underwear on "casual Fridays" was humorous, the Dockers "Men without pants" ad, aired immediately afterward, was just puzzling. How would a bunch of guys trooping around sans pants sell pants?
-- FLO TV and the Dodge Charger: Jason's girlfriend has removed his spine, so he accompanies her on lingerie-shopping trips while the game is on. "Change out of that skirt, Jason!" says the narrator. Likewise, a group of grim, dead-eyed men are shown as Dexter's Michael C. Hall tensely narrates how domesticated they are: "I will say yes when you want me to say yes," "I will be quiet when you don't want to hear me to say no," ," "I will be civil to your mother," "I will put the seat down," "I will watch your vampire shows with you." Then, "And because I do this, I will drive the car I want to drive" -- a Dodge Charger -- "man's last stand." Sheesh.
Maybe you have nominations of your own? Maybe you loved the ones I hated, or vice versa? Have your say now!
-- Anne Neville